Tuesday, May 31, 2005

The evolution of math since 1950

Teaching Math In 1950

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is
4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1960

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is
4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1970

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is
$80. Did he make a profit?

Teaching Math In 1980

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is
$80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math In 1990

A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and
inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the
preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of
$20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class
participation after answering the question: How did the birds and
squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong

Teaching Math In 2005

Un hachero vende una carretada de madera para $100. El costo de la
producción es $80 ....

I'm Back!!!

Oh shit, you're fucked now!!!

That's right. I am back from my hiatus of moving. Moving sucks. I think I am done for now. There are a few boxes still to go through and put away. I can live with what we have out now. It is going to take some time to get use to being in this house. Everyone seems to like it. I hope it is not some kind of jinx. Hell, my Mom can't stop talking about it. Mrs B keeps telling me when she gets off the phone with my Mom, that she is always talking about something new. I thought I was bad. To top it off, my step-Dad likes it. It is hard to impress him. I think the only people that we have left to show are Mrs B's parents. Hell, like that is going to happen. The only way that is going to happen is if we email pics. They don't ever visit. Don't get me started on that, I digress. Being a homeowner is going to be a full time job. Now that it is mine, I am willing to do the repairs necessary. Hell, before with renting, I told the slumlord. If he didn't fix it, I said fuck it. Now it is my responsibility. I am willing take that on. I love a challenge. Well, I have some blogs to catch up on. I will try to post something else soon. During the move I was supplied with a new arsenal of photos and jokes. I will keep them coming.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Graduation Day

My youngest son, J, graduated from Head Start today. Next year, Kindergarden!!!

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

This is just a reminder to get your eyes checked.

Sunday, May 22, 2005


General Lee

I took the kids to see their first live Demolition Derby. Wow! It was fun. They even had the General Lee in it. Good to see she can still take a beating. I can really tell my daughter is a Tom-Boy. She couldn't stop talking about it. Oh, I haven't mentioned, she also enjoys watching The Contender.

Good Job Mom

Mom runs sting to nab Internet predator

Yabba Dabba Doo - Goodbye

Voice of Fred Flintstonehas died at 85

Friday, May 20, 2005

Damn Taxes

The only thing that the IRS has not yet taxed is the male penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 10% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts.

Effective January 1, 2005, your penis will be taxed according to size. The brackets are as follows:

10-12" Luxury Tax $30.00
8-10" Pole Tax $25.00
5-8" Privilege Tax $15.00
4-5" Nuisance Tax $3.00
Males exceeding 12" must file under capital gains.
Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!!!!!

IRS NOTE: We are still waiting for answers for the following questions:
Are there penalties for early withdrawals?
What if one's penis is self employed?
Are condoms a deductible expense as work clothes?
Is there an additional tax if you are not circumcised?

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Fonda Film Banned From Ky. Theaters

ELIZABETHTOWN, Ky. — The owner of two Kentucky theaters has refused to show the new Jane Fonda film "Monster-in-Law" because of the activist role the actress took during the Vietnam War.

"I think Vietnam veterans appreciate this," said Mancuso, who fought in the Mekong Delta during the Vietnam war. "There is no defense for what she did."
Boutwell also banned previous Jane Fonda films, as well as Michael Moore's film, "Fahrenheit 9/11."

Ashton, Topher Departing 'That '70s Show'

The Formans' basement is about to get a little less crowded. After seven seasons, up-and-coming stars Ashton Kutcher and Topher Grace are putting "That '70s Show" behind them, opting to leap into the present and pursue other projects. But by the hugs and tears at the finale, you can tell the decision was bittersweet.

This show has one more season left. When your main character leaves, it is time to pack it up. It will be interesting to see why Kelso left, but we have to wait until next season.

And are we finally going to learn what Fez's nationality is?
"We will find out where Fez is from this year," Valderrama told FOX.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

HEY-YOU'RE...: The seventh fan to recognize Chappelle in South Africa

Too funny not to post. I figured you all would like a good laugh.

Always a bride's maid...

...finally a bride!!!

Last night I took my family out to dinner. When we arrived home, I turned on the television just in time to see Jimmy Jackass put his car into the wall. Then after the initial wreck and trying to get back to the pits, something broke in the steering and then he hit the inside wall. HAHA, he finished 40th. I thought to myself, this is going to help a lot of drivers that are in and out of the chase. After dancing a jig in celebration of Jackass wrecking, I went into the kitchen, got a Coke, and settled down to watch the rest of the race.

Last night was the Kasey/Tony show. Those two battled back and forth all night. Tony was strong at the beginning of the runs, while Kasey fell back. The announcers figured out that Kasey was going with low air pressure at the beginning of the runs because he always fell back. On long green runs, Kasey would then haul ass and fly by Tony. At the end, Kasey prevailed to get his first win in the Nextel Cup Series after finishing second six times in previous races. Congrats to Kasey Kahne.

With Jimmy Jackass wrecking, we now have 19 drivers eligible for the Chase. There are 15 races left. I think we will have more than ten drivers in this year's Chase. With more drivers in the post season, the more fans are going to tune in to watch the late season races. This will put Nascar in strong competition with the NFL. That is still months away, we will talk more about that when the time comes.

Kasey's win made him the Big Jumper of the week (that is eligble) of four spots to settle in at 15th (-301). Mark Martin is the Big Dropper of the week of four spots, now 10th (-218). Dale Jr fell out of the Top 10, falling two spots to 11th (-229). Jackass still leads in the points, but only by 41 points to Greg Biffle. Keving Harvick is back in the Top 10 at 8th (-198). Sterling Marlin is towing the line in 19th (-394).

Friday, May 13, 2005

Whats going on?

I really don't have anything to write about tonight. I have been so drained with working and packing, I haven't had time to sit in front of the computer. I just thought I would comment on just about anything I can find in the news. Hell, I do this for myself any way since I only get comments from one person. I know he likes the stuff I put up. I know there are others, just still hunting for comments.

"The jig is up." But I am sure this isn't the end of this story. The LSM (Lame Steam Media) will not let this story die until they get a conviction. The only cool thing is, is that Wendy's is giving away FREE Small Frostys. Thanks Anna.

Tiger chokes after seven years!!! It happens to the best of them.

Quit bullshittin' and vote already. I could get first graders to vote faster on if they wanted ice cream or cookies for a snack.

It is about time someone came to their senses.

"In this situation, the reasonable observer must be deemed aware of the patriotic uses, both historical and present, of the phrase `In God We Trust,"' Judge Robert King wrote. The court said the inscription would be unconstitutional if it served a religious purpose.

Broken toe update: It is doing better. I am actually wearing a normal shoe. I felt weird at first. I am going to take my time with it. I don't need to break it again. It is two weeks away from moving day. I have plenty of furniture to carry.

Well, going to spend some time with the family before bed time.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005


This has me scratching my head. How is it that one of the ferret brothers get off with no fine, when last year JR got fined and docked 25 points for saying "shit"? Let me get this straight. You can't slip and accidently curse during a celebration after winning a hard fought race. You can act like a whining little bitch, throw a fit, and disrespect a Nascar official. I am sure we will hear from Dale Jr real soon.

Yet another dumbass

I would like to say thank you and a job well done by our military. They did what was necessary to protect everyone around the White House today. Now lets see what this nut-job was up too. That is what I haven't heard as of yet. Next time could be worse. Instead of flares, the next dumbass could be shot down.

Monday, May 9, 2005

Nascar Update

I figured since I was in the blogging mood I should get out my weekly update on the points chase. There are 16 races left until the Chase. We are now down to 15. Now out are Jeff Burton, Michael Waltrip, and Sterling Marlin.

Jeff Green is an ass. What is his deal? He thinks if he waits a month to get some chip off his shoulder it is okay? That was bullshit. He was running up on or checking up on Waltrip. Finally Mikey got his revenge. In my book, he had every right to do what he did to Green. Now after they have both been called to the Nascar trailer, I think this fued is over.

Jimmy Jackass still leads in the points at 1519. The two biggest jumpers were Mark Martin and Ryan Newman of five spots. Martin 6th and Newman 10th are the newcomers to the Top 10. The drivers to fall out were Kevin Harvick and Dale Jarrett. Jeremy Mayfield is towing the line in 15th at 386 back. Jeff Burton is on the outside looking in at 406 back. JR is still 9th at -307.
Enough said...

Hey All

I HATE MOVING!!! Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to get out of this hell hole. But going through old shit and packing everything in boxes suck. I started getting things boxed up yesterday. I will be back at it again today. I want to attempt to move everything in one day. I know it is a pipe dream, but we are not moving too far from where we are now and I have plenty of help lined up.

The reason I have't made any posts in four days is because I have been running around getting paper work filled out and signed. Damn, I didn't know buying a house was like running around in a rat maze.

The housing inspector met me last Thursday. Overall the house is in really good condition. The major problem was that the electric service cable housing was dry rotted. This leads to moisture/water entering the cable and proceeding to the circuit breaker box. Some of the breakers were corroded. An electrician is supposed to be there today to repair it all with no expense to me. The present owners have to have it repaired before the sale can go through.

Well, I have to get back to packing. If I don't post, you all know what fun I am having. Speaking of not posting in a while, where is ALMTTR???

Thursday, May 5, 2005

Hey Liberals...

Even if she gets caught, she will still get an A.

Monday, May 2, 2005

21 Guns for Airboss

The loss of a loved one, a companion, a friend can be hard to take as we miss them. For what we miss is what we now know made them so special in our lives. We take a part of them and pass on in our lives to our friends and family as to keep their memory alive. Goodbye to our dear friend Airboss, may his ashes Rest in Peace in a .50 cal ammo can. May we have a moment of silence, along with 21 gun salute. Our prayers and condolences go with Elaine, family, and friends.


In one month I will be saying goodbye to this view of downtown Cincinnati. It has been my view out my back door of the house we have been renting for the last five years. I was just approved and the contract agreed upon tonight for a new house. Now we have to get past the house inspector. The last house I had inspected was infested with termites. I am keeping my fingers crossed on this one. Mrs. B and I really want this one.

Up in the Top 10

If you are a fan of the "Big One", you got your fill this weekend. There was one in the Cup Series (25 cars at Lap 132) as well as on in the Busch Series (16 cars at Lap 17). Had one early, had one late. It really doesn't matter. When you loose that many cars in one wreck, it reeks havoc on the points standings. At one time JR was up to sixth in the points. He settled into the Top 10 at nineth. He might not lead in the points, but he is really setting himself up to guarantee himself a spot in the Chase for the Cup.

He could have had a Top 10 finish if it weren't for Jimmy Jackass. I don't remember which turn it was, but as they were coming out of the turn he scrapped the wall. When he freaked out and over corrected to get off the wall, he slammed into the side of Kevin Harvick, who clipped JR's car and turned him into the wall. Somehow Truex's car was clipped which sent him across the grass and he hit the inside wall. There were a few other drivers collected into it. What was real funny, was when Jackass was coming out of the Infield Care Center he was stopped by one of the Fox reporters. Jimmy started coming off with something about someone hitting him. In mid sentence, the reporter stopped him and said something to the effect of "wait, watch this." When they reviewed the clip, Jackass's car was never touched. He went off into the wall all by himself!!! Finally, after all of these weeks, you finally get caught up in your own shit. There is no one to blame this time for your "over driving, coming out of the corner, I can't keep up with Dale Jr. at 'Dega late in the race" mess except for yourself. You got called out on nation tv. HAHAHA. You finally got a taste of your own. Hell, you set off the "Big One" when you clipped the 4 car with your back bumper going after McMurray. But, since the Fox guys want to be so far up the points leader's ass (only to be out of Mike Helton's), they called it a "series of events" that caused it. Don't get me started on the Hollywood Hotel. That has done run its course. Don't mind the pun.

Well, after Dega, this is how the points look as of now. Tony Stewart made the biggest jump of eight spots this week to put him back in the Top 10, of sixth. Ryan Newman and Sterling Marlin took the biggest drops of the week of eight spots, to fall back to 15th and 17th. The drivers that weren't in the Top 10 that are in this week are Stewart, Jarrett, Harvick, Earnhardt Jr., and McMurray. Those out are Martin, Wallace, Edwards, Newman, and Marlin. They were all in the "Big One". Michael Waltrip is the driver that moved back into the Chase. No one fell out of the Chase.

Things look to be settling down at DEI. JR's pit crew actaully pulled off a 14.4 sec 4 tire pit stop. I was really surprized when I just watched at Bristol about a month ago them prancing around the car. It is about time someone lit a fire under their asses.

Next week should be very interesting. Make sure you wear the appropriate attire as the next race on the schedule is Darlington, the "Lady in Black" for the Dodge Charger 500. The race is on Saturday. You know what that means, NIGHT RACING.